the next chapter

I'm someone who grieves for the main character in a dramatic movie or series.

I bite my nails as time runs out.

I'm anxious hoping that the hero makes it in time.

My heart ached for Carrie on her roller coaster relationship with "Big."

I wished that Meredith and Derek would see what I saw - that they were meant to be together.

I worried for Charlie (old - Party of Five) as he battled cancer.

Our last batch of movers came and packed us up today. Our house is empty of stuff - and full of echoes.

I did some final errands, while I still have a vehicle (the one that is staying in Korea) and while my "ration card" is still valid.

I felt numb, going through the motions of the day, wondering.....

What is in our next chapter?

I could have never predicted the past two years.

A lifetime of events have occurred.

We came here, a childless couple.

Hopeful.

Adventurous.

A trip home and back - returned us with - three children in tow.

16 months of heartache,

agony,

surprise,

and

overflowing joy.

I regret nothing.

I am uneasy of what is to come. I don't put that in the category of fear.

How can I fear what I cannot imagine?

Maybe that is why I'm uneasy. I cannot imagine what this next chapter holds.

So.

I am on eggshells.

I am full of anticipation. Anticipation that holds neither the positive or the negative.

Just. Knowing.

Something is about to happen.

We board the plane to move back to America on Thursday. When I buckle my seat belt I will want to exhale, close my eyes, and sleep.

But.

I don't know if that's possible.

We will be entering - fully - into a huge (er) chapter in our lives.

Please continue to pray - right through that final hour - that all of "this" goes away - and that we settle. Before trial.

While this is huge for us - it is nothing for God. He can make it happen in the blink of an eye.

xo
K.