Listen.

I've had a nagging question for weeks now. About prayer. About why we pray for healing. Does it ... do anything? Does it work? Now... I understand what prayer does as far as drawing me closer to God, connecting me to Him. What it does with my relationship to Jesus, and understanding Him more. What it does with the Holy Spirit, and how it allows Him to move in me, to guide me. I understand how God can move me, and shape me... and get me to where He wants me to be through prayer. I understand the comfort it brings, and the deepening of relationship that comes as a result. I love to pray. I'm not asking because I'm trying to get out of anything. I just want to know if ... MY prayers can ... move the hand of God.

So. I've been asking, seeking, searching... and listening.

God's been answering. LOUD and clear.

Yesterday... I was ... knocked over with His answer. I've been reading "The Book of Mysteries" which I highly recommend. Only God knew what page I would be on yesterday. The book was given to me last April. I didn't start reading it until school started this past Fall. I read it almost every day, but, not every day... so again. Only God knew when this question swelling inside of me, would rise so much in me that I demanded an answer.

Inside of me I've been screaming - desperately - WHY SHOULD I PRAY FOR HEALING IF YOU ALREADY KNOW THE ANSWER?!?!?! YOU ALREADY KNOW HOW THIS ALL TURNS OUT!!!! Because yeah... I wanted an answer.

I believe that God is all knowing. But I do not believe that God is up there with puppet strings. I believe that He ordains some things. I believe that He allows some things.

Still. IF HE ALREADY KNOWS... why am I praying?

Why am I praying for HEALING specifically, because I "get" all the other stuff.

Saturday morning... I had intended to sleep in. I didn't. I woke up shortly before 5. So, I got up and started my day. I decided to read. The title of the page I read is "Moving the Universe". It referenced an event that took place pre-Christ. Abraham has sent one of his servants to a city to find a wife for his son Issac. The servant goes to a well and he prays. He knows pretty specifically what is supposed to go down at the well he is standing at, so that he knows who the girl is. Because he had prayed that something pretty specific would occur. Before he was even done praying... the pretty specific event - happens. And there she is. Rebekah.

The question is... when did God answer the servant's prayer? And the dialogue goes on from there on the page ... when she got to the well? Before? On her way? What about HER plans for that day? When she MADE her plans? What about the weather? What if it was windy? What if she decided she didn't need water right then and there? WHEN did God move? When did He answer?

God had to orchestrate EVERYTHING perfectly - time EVERYTHING perfectly - for all of that to happen when it did. Everyone involved... Abraham's request, the servant's speed in getting to his destination, Rebekah's plans for the day....all of it, and more.

And now I need to quote the author of the book... "He had to move the universe...And so it is for you, and for all His children. For God to answer even one of your prayers, even the smallest of your prayers, He must direct all things and move and coordinate all events of time and space to make it happen. He must move the universe. And for you He WILL move the universe... For that is how much He loves you...with a love greater than time and space...greater than the universe".

And that is when I finally "got it". Our prayers CAN move the hand of God. But, we need to remember not to put God in our understanding of time and space. Yes, He already knows how all of "this" will turn out - but - only because He is all knowing and He isn't ... "in" our time. He's in HIS time and HIS space, which is something I certainly don't understand. He already knows what He decided, and He already knows if we moved His hand. That doesn't mean we aren't ABLE to move His hand. He just already knows how it worked out.

My disclaimer is - I'm certainly not an expert and I have not had a DAY of formal training or teaching in theology. This is just what I believe God is trying to show me.

And because I'm such an over analyzer, God is being VERY clear to me this time around...

I needed to go to the store yesterday - NOT PLANNED (but, God knew). I had already shopped and wasn't planning on going to the store again until Tuesday, but, we were THRILLED to have some last minute plans and I wanted to pick some things up. I always listen to Christian radio when I'm driving. Always. If not, I'm playing a CD. Well, on the way to the store I didn't like the song that was on, so I flipped to the other Christian station I listen to. I didn't like that song either but, instead of hitting "CD" I hit another station, a regular station.... you know what was playing? "And here's to you, Mrs Robinson, Heaven holds a place for those who pray, hey, hey, hey..." Nope. Not a Christian song by a long shot - HOWEVER - the words were certainly relevant.

Today in church, we sang a song I have not sung in .... probably over 30 years. It's a hymn... "In seasons of distress and grief, my soul has often found relief, and oft escaped the tempter's snare, by thy return, sweet hour of prayer"...

I think, if I'm going to be honest, I'm afraid of what His answer to my current pleading might be. I am proof that God's answer is sometimes "no". I've prayed for healing for more than one person... I prayed over our three pregnancies... I know SO many people who've gotten "no" for an answer... to things that just make no sense to us right now ... But. I'm not the only one He has said "no" to. He said "no" to Jesus when Jesus pleaded that His Father take the "cup" (of wrath) from Him. He's also said "yes" to me more times than I can count... and He's chosen to say "yes" to things I've just taken for granted, and then not even been paying close enough attention to, to say "thank you".

Hebrews 5:7-9 New American Standard Bible (NASB) says:

"7 In the days of His flesh, He offered up both prayers and supplications with loud crying and tears to the One able to save Him from death, and He was heard because of His piety. 8 Although He was a Son, He learned obedience from the things which He suffered. 9 And having been made perfect, He became to all those who obey Him the source of eternal salvation,"

This verse was referenced in church today... and something inside me stirred (perhaps because God was STILL telling me to pray) ... picturing Jesus BEGGING God... like I have, like I am... "He was heard". We are heard. I AM HEARD, because THIS VERSE? Was referenced. JESUS prayed - I should pray. Jesus was heard. I am heard.

You. Are heard.

Trust me on this one.

Pray.

XO
K.